‘Southampton versus Brighton & Hove Albion in the Premier League. What is the worst possible way we can treat that derby?’
This was the daunting task befalling Sky Sports’ executive match-ruining committee a few weeks into the season, a responsibility eventually handed down to a work experience student to properly crown the end of their two-week placement.
Said 16 year old Joanna Furlong: “I’d sensed that the task was becoming overwhelming for the group, not least after a long day of pressing high against the lounge bar, and like all top temporary staff, I was on my toes waiting for a chance to come my way. I knew that the scheduling of the south coast derby had been the number one item on the agenda, but reading the game like I know I can, it was clear that when my superiors returned to the office they’d become distracted. It can happen, procrastination is the curse of the workplace, be it on site or online, but I was determined it wasn’t going to be my master.’
The tenacious Furlong explained that she had to tap in to flowering leadership skills to get the supporter-averse arrangements over the line.
‘As they came shuffling through the door, puce-faced and boisterous, I decided to make my mark: “It has to be a Friday night. A Friday night derby”, I boomed in front of them, stopping them in their disjointed tracks. “Saturday lunchtime, Monday night, they’ve both got their strengths in belittling the supporters, but with a Friday we can finish their football interest even before the weekend’s started!”
‘I concluded the argument with growing confidence, and I could tell they were impressed. They went with it in a heartbeat.’
Furlong is warm and engaging during our short interview, happy to talk about her motivations for learning about the dark arts of fixture rescheduling.
‘I’m only young but I am keen to make a difference’, she added. ‘Sky Sports literally gave me a platform to do that. Before we got involved, Southampton v Brighton & Hove Albion was an eagerly anticipated Saturday 3pm local derby, with folks happy to end the week with a tipple or two in the Friday night hostelries, glad to have packed the working week away and looking forward to the next day’s big game. Excitement would rise on the morning of the match, still time to spend with families and friends or admin, and then maybe head out for a bit of lunch or another tipple or two on route to St Mary’s, just like it always used to be before 1992 (I’ve done my research!) But with just one decision, I managed to change all that: instead, in came the Friday rush hour factor and the opportunity for our loyal subscribing neutrals to flick through the channels and settle down for a bit of reliable old footy. To be responsible for that, well…I have to say it was quite empowering’.
I asked Furlong where she saw herself in twenty years.
‘Well, that’s the question! I have a vision, so many ideas, so many time slots to tap into. The Christmas Day match is there for someone bold enough to implement it, in between the King/Queen’s speech and ‘Enders. Amazon are inching towards it, but I question their ability to go the extra mile. Wherever I end up, I want to be innovative, a trailblazer, a disruptor. And if a work experience student wants to put forward a 1am kick off to pull in the Kuala Lumpar audience, who would I be to not to listen to that?!’
It’s quite clear that Furlong is one to watch for the future. With FIFA president Gianni Infantino set to rename the FIFA Club World Cup the ‘Gianni Infantino Trophy’ (or GIT, for short) by 2029 (or ‘27 if his full dreams are realised) whose to say she won’t have her name on it in years to come?
